The Quest

I am a big fan of “The Office”. When I joined the Foreign Service, I knew I would have to make some sacrifices. One sacrifice is missing the regularly scheduled airing of my favorite episodes. But I thought “Hey, it’s all on the internet, right?”. Well, yes and no. Thus began my long quest to try to watch “The Office”.

Step 1

As I have remarked before, there is no broadband internet access at my temporary living quarters here. It does not make sense for me to have DSL installed when I will leave within the one month. So for internet access, I use the clubhouse computer. Unfortunately, the clubhouse computer will not let you download any programs, so I quickly found out that I could not download the necessary program to watch The Office.

Step 2

At work, we do have the necessary programs to watch the Office, but the problem is, I am at work. I tried watching it on my lunch break, but the connection was too choppy and I had to eat lunch anyway.

Step 3

I borrowed a friend’s laptop to use at the clubhouse (they have a wireless connection too – it just doesn’t extend to my apartment). Unfortunately, when you log in via the wireless router, they can tell you are from the Philippines. And for some reason, that means it is not allowed for you to watch the episode on nbc.com or hulu.com.

Step 4

I broke down and bought some dial-up modem cards so I could access the internet from my apartment. Via dial-up. I was reminded of my AOL days in college. Unfortunately, my new desktop is too advanced – it doesn’t even have a phone jack or a modem for a phone. So my cards were useless. But wait – what about my pathetically slow laptop (bought in 2001)? I revived my old laptop to life. The laptop doesn’t have a wireless modem, so I couldn’t use the wireless router at the clubhouse. But the laptop does have a phone jack and a phone modem. So after some unspecified amount of time, I got it working and logged in.

Step 5

I go to the ITunes site, figuring that even if it can figure out I’m in the Philippines, it will still let me buy it, right? I guess, but first it wants me to download the latest and greatest version of ITunes. This is no small task. Downloading a 65 MB program over dialup is an arduous. I started it about 40 minutes ago and so far have downloaded only 7 MB. It says it has 3:30 left.

This is where I am right now. Here are my options going forward:

1. Keep downloading from ITunes. It might finish sometime tonight. Then I have to download the actual program, which will likely be an even bigger file. Then there is the question of whether my tired old laptop will even be able to play it – I imagine it’s going to be a bit choppy. Ok, the internet connection just broke. Probably someone just tried to call me. This one won’t work.

2. I could haul my desktop computer down to the clubhouse. It has a wireless modem and it could download thing about 10 times faster. It might still take hours to download a large video file like The Office though. I could be there all night. Probably a no go.

3. I could borrow my friend’s laptop again and say I really want to watch The Office. I think I am pushing my luck with that one though.

4. Wait until November when I go to visit my in-laws. Maybe I’ll get them to DVR it for me. Probably my most realistic option.

By the way, I am typing all of this on my desktop, while my laptop is connecting to the internet. I just reconnected at the princely speed of 40 kbps. Sweet.